Wednesday, 13 August 2014

Gather Ye Rosebuds While Ye May

Recently I watched Man of the Year. It wasn't a great film, but the standout performer was Robin Williams and he seems to be the standout in the vast majority of his films. Be it the comedies where he thrived, or his critically acclaimed dramatic roles. I've seen people say he was taken for granted, and another that said he seems invincible. That sums it up for me. I'm not going to  artificially inject him into situations he was never a part of, but he was a staple of my childhood however you look at it. Flubber, Mrs Doubtfire, Jumanji, Aladdin. Hook. It's strange, because despite all of those he'll probably be best remembered to me as Teddy Roosevelt in Night at the Museum, one of my favourite films while growing up - even if I hate to admit it.

In the last couple of days I've watched The Dead Poets Society, and re-watched his Oscar Winning performance in Good Will Hunting. Despite only being a supporting part his role seems so vital, he brings life to characters that could so easily be flat and unsubstantiated. I hope that good can come out of this; that it gives a chance to lift the taboo on mental health issues but I somehow doubt it. The headlines splashed across front pages make it clear, this was a man driven to this because of money issues. That may have played a factor, but it doesn't tell the story. Equally, the need by [tabloid] newspapers to splash the gruesome, unnecessary circumstances that surrounded his passing really upset me. I'm not even going to mention the twitter comments.

Rest easy O Captain, My Captain.

I'm not sure if it's just his death, or a few other factors but I've been pretty down the last couple of days. Partly, I think it's partly down to the fact that I thought by twenty I'd be a little more organised. I'd be in a band, or I'd be doing photography for at least some kind of pay. On Sunday I went to a wrestling show, and told someone that it'd be really cool to be able to wrestle. They just asked me, "Why don't you learn?". It really is that simple, and I had absolutely no answer to them. Just like last week when a friend asked why I wasn't in a band if I wanted to be. No response. The main reason with that is that I hate everything I write. The lyrics are average to poor, and the melodies are clich├ęd. 

At least I've managed to get to a pretty good university, but I don't feel like I fit in as well as I'd like. Despite appearing slightly tech-y I know next to nothing about recent technology, and my grasp of programming outside Java is fairly basic. I'm not very good at video games, unless you count FIFA which I'm fairly good with, and I get bored with single player games far too quickly. But equally I'm not a sports guy either - as much as maybe I would like to be.

All of this can be solved with just one thing, hard work. So, I need to draw up a plan. Which I guess looks something like:
  • Invest in [cheap] studio lighting, now I've actually got money.
  • Get some press passes sorted!
  • Find some models for photography, and start snappin'.
  • Just keep writing lyrics - one day I'll be able to take the best lines from each individual song and actually manage to make a decent song.
  • Practice C++ [Fairly crucial]
  • Just try to keep up-to-date with tech things
  • Travel, Travel, Travel, Travel, Travel, [Photos], Travel
  • Get in touch with people who actually do any of these things and figure out the next steps from here
  • Actually interact with other humans
How hard can it be?

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